


Fool Me Once

by Piper_Halliwell1979



Category: Supernatural
Genre: April Fools' Day, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-05
Updated: 2016-03-05
Packaged: 2018-05-24 19:34:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6164161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Piper_Halliwell1979/pseuds/Piper_Halliwell1979
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With April Fool's Day approaching Dean is determined to get Sam with the ultimate prank</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fool Me Once

Nope. Not this time. Dean was getting Sam good this year. No more juvenile pranks. This April Fool's Day required planning and precision. He also needed to get the proverbial ball rolling at least a couple weeks beforehand. Ain't no rest for the wicked, they say. 

Dean had pulled some major pranks on his younger brother and he'd been on the receiving end of quite a few over the years. They would engage in weeks long attacks on each other, often escalating toward embarrassing emergency room visits. Sam would never live down the time Dean put super glue on a big rubber dildo, left it where Sam had to pick it up, and told the admitting staff at the hospital Sam had mixed up the tube of glue with his lubricant. 

Dean even enlisted his boyfriend, Cas, to help. As a fallen angel he had a peculiar sense of humor. He didn't find amusement in tricks but delighted in cheesy puns and dirty limericks. Go figure. Still, Dean asked for his help and he was willing as long as no physical harm came to Sam. Dean swore the only thing getting hurt would be Sam's ego if they pulled it off.

"I don't see how adding two pages of false lore to a book is funny," Cas had said as he seamlessly altered the book. 

"It's just a part of it, babe. I need him to think it's at least possible." Dean knew the first thing Sam would do is research. Very predictable. But first he had to set it up like dominoes.

Later that night Dean knocked on Sam's door. When he was invited in he asked Sam if he had any condoms because he and Cas were out. Sam scrunched his face in mock disgust but checked his bedside table drawer. All he had was an empty box, which Dean already knew because he'd taken them earlier. Sam told his brother to take a cold shower or something and quit "doing it like bunnies."

The next step was to have very loud sex in said shower because it was closer to Sam's room. Cas was kind of verbal during sex anyway. Sam would just assume they threw caution to the wind and bare-backed it on impulse. It would set the stage for the following week.

The hardest part for Dean would be pretending to be sickened by the smells of his favorite foods. Cas was still going to ferret him out some breakfast. He even decided his fake pregnancy would make him unable to drink beer, make his nipples sore, and be overly emotional. Sam would get curious and consult the mighty interwebs before seeking out the book in the library that Cas helped forge. 

After a few days of crying over Spanish soap operas(some of those tears were real) and only eating saltines and drinking orange juice around Sam, he finally broached the subject.

"So, Dean. How you feeling?" 

"Eduardo and Felipe might not get to adopt Maria's baby, all I can keep down are these damn crackers, and the smell of beer and bacon makes me hurl. And I'm wearing sweats because all my jeans are too tight. Oh I'm peachy keen, Sam," Dean feigned distress. He was really selling it.

"I, um...I did some research and I need to ask you something. That night that you asked me if I had any condoms you could borrow...did you guys go ahead without one?" Sam was wincing at his own words. 

"I don't know Sammy. Maybe. I don't think Cas has anything I could catch. I just have the flu or something." Still selling it.

"Dean, according to Web MD and some lore I found in the library, I think Cas might have gotten you pregnant."

Now for his Golden Globe moment, "Sam, in case you haven't noticed we're a couple dudes. I ain't hatching any angel eggs, okay? Go read your book again. You translated something wrong."

Sam showed him the book with the printout of the translation. "It says here when an angel mates with a human it must result in the creation of a nephilim. Successfully raising your 'abomination' earns a blessing on your union and your child is no longer an abomination."

Damn, Cas made his part sound pretty believable as well. Dean faked panic.

"What do I do? Do I take a test or something? I don't want to be like Schwarzenegger in that bad movie."

Sam handed Dean a brown paper sack. "Here, I went to the pharmacy and got three different kinds."

Dean looked in the bag, rolled his eyes, and walked down the hall to the bathroom. Sam followed.

"Seriously? You gotta watch me pee?" Dean asked. He knew the prank would be up in a matter of minutes now but he wanted to milk the last of it. He tore open a box and pulled the cap off a stick. Sam opened the other two and told him to just use the cup that came with one of them and dip the sticks in it. At least he gave Dean the courtesy of turning his back to him.  
Dean lined up his tests on the edge of the sink after flushing the rest of his pee cup. "How long do these take?" He asked as the control line lit up on each one. "Couple minutes," Sam replied.

They stood there watching. Dean's eyes widened when he saw the first plus sign. Okay, false positive. Just a drugstore pee stick. Those things can't be accurate. Second test. Second blue line. The fuck was happening? This was supposed to be a joke. Third test. Another plus sign.

"Oh fuck. Fuckety fuck FUCK!!" Dean was in a real panic situation. He got dizzy and sank down to to cool tile. "I was just fucking with you, Sam. What am I supposed to do? How do I tell Cas? We never talked about kids and abominations..."

Sam couldn't control himself. He started laughing and jumping up and down. "I bought those on Amazon! They're drug tests, dude! You've been having Cas swipe mild edibles from the kitchen to snack on. Oh my god, your face!"

"I fucking hate you."


End file.
